I don’t know where I got it into my head that I’m not allowed to take time off, but somewhere along the way, this became my mantra. Going on vacation? I better take my laptop and edit while I’m there! Going to my Granny’s house for the weekend? Can’t forget my external hard drives so I can still be ready to work! Really, it’s absurd. It wasn’t until Matt sat me down and asked if we could talk about office hours that I realized something needed to change.

After that discussion, we came to the conclusion that work needs to have beginning and ending hours. This whole “work til it’s done” thing, while ok when used sparingly, isn’t a healthy way to live day to day. It’s not as though I didn’t have enough time to complete my edits and answer emails- it was just this “work work work WORK” cycle I’d dug myself into as a result of never having enough time when I was still at the desk job. Because when I WAS still with Northrop Grumman, the only time I had to edit sessions and respond to inquiries was after 5 pm and on weekends.

I used to take a lot of pride in my email response time- if I got an email at 9:30 pm, I’d answer it right then and there. I actually used to check my emails before going to bed, just to make sure I didn’t leave anything unanswered. Now don’t get me wrong- my clients SHOULD expect prompt response times. My goal is to answer everything from my brides and groom within 24 hours (emails from non-clients can take longer, just because I need to give my couples priority). Sometimes I drop the ball on that, but it’s something I’m actively working to improve. But what I didn’t realize I was doing was teaching my clients to EXPECT responses at 11 pm on a Saturday night. I wasn’t allowing myself the freedom of enjoying my weekends with Matt, or to take guilt-free time off with an auto-responder at the ready. I’m one of those strange people who actually enjoys answering email, but I was becoming a slave to my inbox.

These days, we’ve worked to create a few boundaries that I’m still learning to adjust to: work begins at 7 or 8 in the morning, depending on how long it takes me to roll out of bed. I have an option to take an hour away from desk for lunch, but I usually forget to do so :). And then works ENDS at 5:30-6:00. As in, I shut down the computer and close my office door. I check my email a couple of times throughout the evening, but unless it’s something urgent, it can wait until the following morning to answer. And then on weekends? I stay out of my office. It was the most freeing thing ever to realize I was allowed to do that! If I have a wedding on a Saturday, I do cull my images on Saturday night/Sunday, but I always make sure to do that on my laptop so I can still be downstairs hanging out with Matt.

Being a small business owner means I’m in charge of every facet of my business, meaning I often work longer hours than an employee who works for someone else. I have to remind myself on occasion, though, that no matter how much I love my job and love my clients, that this career is not my entire life. I work so that I can support the lifestyle Matt & I want to live, not the other way around of living for the joy of working. I work to live, not live to work. When things like spending time with God, being a wife, and being with friends & family consistently start to take a backseat to my job, I know it’s time for something to change. Because as amazing as this career is, it isn’t what defines me, and it isn’t where my identity lies. Keeping that all perspective helps me unchain myself from my desk at the end of each workday.

Happy Friday!